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5 Reasons I’m Glad I’m an Older Parent

Living in Podunk, I’m considered an Old Parent. Many of the parents in my neck of the woods began having children when they were in their late teens and early twenties, while my daughter was born when I was 31.  The first year or two that Daisy was in elementary school, I felt a little insecure about the fact that I was so old compared to many of my peers.

Now– I revel in it.  Why?

1. I’m not my kids’ friend.  And that is more than okay with me.  I’ve got enough experience under my belt, and there’s enough of an age difference that I am perfectly comfortable making decisions that may not be popular with my kids.

2. I’m mature.  I’m not caught up in the cliques around the school or stuck in a high school mentality because I got that crap out of my system before I ever had kids.

3. I’ve seen the world.  I have a college education.  I’ve lived and worked in other countries. I’ve supported myself and lived on my own. I know that I can always take care of myself and my family no matter what happens.

4. I’ve got my own friends.  My social life doesn’t revolve exclusively around parents of my kids friends. My friends come from all walks of life–some are single, some are divorced, some have no kids. Variety in my social circle means a variety of perspectives, and frankly, far more interesting conversations.

5. I’m confident.  As I approached my 40s the most magical thing happened—I stopped caring what other people thought of me.  The confidence this has inspired is immeasurable.

What about you?  Why are you glad to be a parent in (or approaching) your 40s?

Margaret Barney is a 42 year old mom, writer, and the woman behind Just Margaret. Ordinarily shying away from incendiary topics like politics and religion, every now and then she feels compelled to write about them.


  1. Christin

    May 22, 2012 at 8:51 am

    Great post, I’m definitely not my kids friend…yet. Perhaps when they are adults and have children of their own, then we will be “friends”. Right now, I enjoy being their mom. I also agree with being old enough to rise above the clicks and silliness that continues among peers even into adulthood, at this age, I’m more comfortable to just say, ” whatever” and move on.

    • Margaret

      May 22, 2012 at 11:15 am

      That’s sort of where I am, Christen. When they’ve got kids of their own I do hope to be friends with my kids. But by then, I wonder if I’ll be able to!!

  2. Jacqueline Wilson

    September 19, 2011 at 9:23 am

    TOTALLY agree with this. You become more comfy in your own skin, so you care less about others. Also, can’t agree more about the “not your friend” thing. I’m not friends, with my kids. We can have fun and have a close relationship, but we dont need to be friends. Drives my crazy when I hear parents say they are friends with their kids.

    • Margaret

      September 21, 2011 at 6:35 am

      Making decisions is hard enough, without having to weigh a ‘friendship’ into the mix, don’t you think? I figure, when the kids are adults, then we can be friends…

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