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‘The Bachelor’ and Relationships | What You and Your Spouse Can Learn From Reality TV

Gathering your family or your spouse around the TV may be your best quality time of the entire day. On the line-up of prime time shows,“Reality TV” has drawn much attention and brings the viewers up into the drama. But does Reality TV live up to its name? There is nothing real about manufactured drama and made for TV brawls.

Shows such as The Bachelor claim to help contestants find true love, but they do nothing to further the interests of the American family. This sad fact is shown by the abysmal success rate couples from the show have had, two out of nineteen from The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. In fact, these shows often detract from the true commitment and honesty it takes to make a real family; one in which children can and should be raised.

The Importance of Family

Raising children is an incredibly difficult endeavor. The only guarantee in parenting is that your children will not be what or who you anticipate. Because of the challenges of a baby who may never stop crying, who thinks sleep is for the weak and who is endlessly hungry, parents need to be able to be open and honest with one another about the difficulties of this time of their lives.

In addition, parents—mothers, especially—need to feel supported by their spouses. Parenting in the Internet age means being constantly bombarded by media judgment, something that will make even the most secure mother question her decisions. Spouses have worked hard to provide food for their family, protection, and a good education for their children, but parenting and what goes on inside the home need the most cooperative effort from spouses.

What’s Wrong with The Bachelor

A television show such as The Bachelor simplifies commitment to the lowest common denominator. It is impossible to build a true marriage on the shallow criteria that such a show emphasizes. The Bachelor focuses on surface qualities such as physical attraction and basic interests.

A real marriage is based on a fundamental connection that goes beyond such narrow criteria. Once a couple brings a child into the world, they realize even more that they need to be in agreement on values and ethics. Before long, your child changes from being a helpless, immobile infant and is a walking, talking toddler. It becomes even more imperative after this change that parents understand one another because your child will test boundaries and need to be disciplined to some degree. Parents cannot achieve the important aim of raising a good and moral young person if they cannot agree on the basics.

A show such as The Bachelor only showcases the initial melodrama of a new relationship without allowing the participants the chance to deepen their understanding of each other before a rejection or commitment is made. Such a practice truly undermines the real commitment that married couples make on a daily basis.

Keeping the Spark Alive

This is not to say that parents should not work at keeping the spark alive in their marriage. In fact, there is almost nothing more important than this. Spouses must remain committed to one another as they walk the long road of parenthood. This loyalty and love will help parents feel solidified in their marriage and parenting style.

Finding ways to fan the flame can be as simple as a loving touch or quick kisses throughout the day. As children see their parents issuing these small tokens of love, they will grow into people who understand the basis of love and be affectionate partners in the future. In addition, your child will see the love and commitment that his parents have for each other and will feel more secure because of this. The shallow romance on The Bachelor is unashamedly promoted by ABC and can promote it as reality to your children.

A Reality Worth Living

There is no doubt about it, marriage is hard. The daily commitment married couples make can wear on a person over time. But it’s important to remember the weight of the vows that each married couple has taken. The strong commitment that married couples make is further solidified if and when they have a child. Watching your spouse become a parent may make you fall in love all over again, but at the same time, the challenges of raising a child can be exhausting. Many couples find themselves arguing when they never had before. The importance of childrearing can cause tempers to fly. This is why a couple should be truly committed before bringing a child into this world.

Reality TV shows such as The Bachelor belittle the commitment that married couples make the day they take their vows and live out day after day. Marriage should enrich your life and make you strive to be a better person as you and your spouse dedicate day after day to each other and your growing family. The last thing married couples need is nonsense on television undermining the important of their commitment by showing “true love” as a state easily and thoughtlessly entered.


Guest writer Carrie G. is a blogger and mom of two girls. She and her husband reside in Charleston where they enjoy camping together and playing with their daughters. Carrie also has written homeowners insurance articles online about how to reduce home insurance costs

This post was written by a guest writer for Prime Parents Club. We are not currently taking new guest writers.